CHAPTER XVI

HOLY WRITS AND THE SAGES 

        The sacred Scriptures use ridicule as their weapon and take the fool as the target at whom the shafts of scorn are directed with power and sure aim. The psalmist sings: 

        The fool hath said in his heart, There is no God. God looked down from heaven upon the children of men to see if there were any that did understand.

        They have gone back.

        Surely men of low degree are a lie: to be laid in the balance, they are altogether lighter than vanity.

        Fools because of their transgressions, and because of their iniquities, are afflicted. 

        The Proverbs specially abound in derision and ridicule at the expense of the ignorant, the vain and the foolish. 

        A foolish woman is clamorous, she is simple and knoweth nothing.

        The way of a fool is right in his own eyes. In the mouth of the foolish is a rod of pride.

        Folly is joy to him that is destitute of wisdom.

        Let a bear robbed of her whelps meet a man, rather than a fool in his folly.

        Speak not in the ears of a fool, for he will despise thy wisdom. 

        The writer of the Proverbs apparently discriminates between the fool as the simpleton and the arrogant fool. The treatment of the arrogant fool is: "Answer a fool according to his folly, lest he be wise in his own conceit," while that of the fool-simpleton: "Answer not a fool according to his folly, lest thou also be like unto him." Of the fool's wit the Proverbs pointedly remark: 

        The legs of the lame are not equal, so is a parable in the mouth of fools.

        As he that bindeth a stone in a sling, so is he who giveth honor to a fool.

        The great God that formed all things rewardeth the fool.

        As a dog returneth to his vomit, so a fool returneth his folly.

        Seest thou a man wise in his own conceit? There is more hope of a fool than of him. The sluggard is wiser in his own conceit than seven men that can render a reason.

        Even the mild Christ did not hesitate to use the fool as his butt. We all know the parable of the foolish virgins. We are not surprised to find Schopenhauer having his fling: 

        A wise man is wise only on condition of living in a world of fools.

        We find in the world of mankind, from a moral standpoint, villainy and baseness, and, from an intellectual standpoint, incapacity and stupidity. Stupid people are generally malicious for the very same reason that the ugly and deformed are.  

        The fool, the defective, and even the physically deformed are put into the same category. This, however, is but the maxim of a pessimist. The fool is not necessarily malicious, but he is certainly ludicrous. Ignorance, silliness, lack of wit, stupidity, naïveté, stolidity, sluggishness, misapprehension, error of understanding will always be fit subjects for the shafts of ridicule and in everlasting themes of the comic.

        The "Al Koran" is not without its laugh. Thus Mohammed tells us: 

        When the Prophet entrusted as a secret unto one of wives a certain accident; and when she disclosed the same, and God made it known unto him; he acquainted her with part of what she had done and forbore to upbraid her with the other part thereof. And when he had acquainted her therewith, she said, Who hath discovered this to thee? He answered, the knowing, the sagacious God hath discovered it unto me. 

        The Hindoo Scriptures ridicule the priests thus: 

        After lying still for a year, these Brahmans, the frogs, have uttered their voices, inspired by the rain-god! 

        In the like vein is the "Upanishad," which compares the priests, the Brahmans, who circle round the holy fire, each holding the robe of him who walks before him, to a row of puppies, each holding in his mouth his predecessor's tail.

        The holy Brahmans are compared to frogs and puppies.

        The Dhammapada of the Buddhists says: 

        If a fool be associated with a wise man, even all his life, he will perceive the truth as little as a spoon perceives the taste of soup. 

        The Chinaman is grave and serious. Confucius is a Chinaman par excellence, as he practically formulated the rules of Chinese "proprieties," and has formed the mold in which Chinese character and civilization have been cast for over two thousand years. In the "Analects” we find the Chinese sage, Confucius, occasionally relaxing his grave demeanor and a smile and a laugh playing on his stern countenance at the sight of man's shortcomings: 

        Blade, but no bloom, or else bloom, but no produce—ay, that is the way with some.

        Whenever Tez-Kunz drew comparisons from others, Master would say, "Ah, how wise and great you must have become! Now I have no time to do that!" 

        Students of old fixed their eyes upon themselves; now they learn with their eyes upon others. 

        Of Wei-shang-Kau he said: 

        Who calls him straightforward? A person once begged some vinegar of him, and he begged it from a neighbor and then presented him with it!  

        "The blossom is out on the cherry tree,

        With a flutter on every spray.

        Dost think that my thoughts go not out to thee,

        Ah, why art thou far away!" 

        Commenting on these lines the Master said, “There can hardly have been much thought going out!' What does distance signify?" 

        Tsz-lu propounded a question about ministering to spirits (of the departed). The Master replied, “Where there is scarcely the ability to minister to (living) men how shall there be ability to minister to the spirits?",

        On his venturing to put a question concerning death he answered, "Where there is scarcely any knowledge of life, how shall there be any about death?"

        Through the intervention of Tzu-1u, Tsz-kau was being appointed governor of Pi. "You are spoiling a good man's son," said the Master. 

        Tsz-kung was consulting him, and asked, "What say you of a person who was liked by all in his village?" 

        "That will scarcely do," he answered.

        "What then, if they all disliked him?"

        “That, too," said he, "is scarcely enough. Better if he were liked by the good folk in the village, and disliked by the bad." 

        The sage Epictetus holds up moral and mental defects to ridicule. The following extracts from Epictetus are taken at random: 

        If we all applied ourselves as heartily to our proper business as the old fellows at Rome do to their schemes; perhaps we, too, might make some proficiency. I know a man older than I am, and who is now superintendent of provisions at Rome. When he passed through this place on his return from exile, what an account did he give me of his former life! and how did he promise that in the future, when he was got back, he would apply himself to nothing but how to spend the remainder of his days in repose and tranquillity. "For how few have I now remaining!" "You will not do it," said I. "When you are once got within the smell of Rome, you will forget all this, and, if you can but once again gain admittance to court, you will go in heartily rejoiced and thank God." "If you ever find me, Epictetus," said he, "putting one foot into the court, think of me whatever you please." How, after all, did he act? Before he entered the city he was met by a billet from Cæsar. On receiving it he forgot all his former resolutions, and has ever since been heaping up one encumbrance upon another. I should be glad now to have an opportunity of putting him in mind of his discourse upon the road, and of saying, How much more clever, a prophet am I than you! 

        A person was talking to me one day about the priesthood of Augustus. I say to him, "Let the thing alone, friend: you will be at great expense for nothing." "But my name," says he, "will be written in the annals." "Will you stand by, then, and tell those who read them, 'I am the person whose name is written there'? But, if you could tell everyone so now, what will you do when you are dead?" "My name will remain." "Write it upon a stone and it will remain just as well." "But pray, what remembrance will there be of you out of Nicopolis?" "But I shall wear a crown of gold." "If your heart is quite set upon a crown, take and put on one of roses, for it will make the prettier appearance." 

        Such a one is happy. He walks with a numerous train. Well, I join myself with the crowd, and I, too, walk with a numerous train. 

        An acquaintance of mine, for no reason, had determined to starve himself to death. I went the third day, and inquired what was the matter. He answered, "I am determined." Well: but what is your motive? for, if your determination be right, we will stay and assist your departure; but, if unreasonable, change it*"We ought to keep our determinations." What do you mean, sir? not all; but such as are right. Else, if you should just now take it into your head that it is right, if you think fit, do not change; but persist, and say, "We ought to keep our determinations."

        With difficulty this person was, however, at last convinced; but there are some at present whom there is no convincing. So that now I think I understand, what before I did not, the meaning of that common saying, that a fool will neither bend nor break. May it never fall to my lot to be a wise, that is an intractable, fool for my friend.

        There are some things which men confess with ease; others, with difficulty. No one, for instance, will confess himself a fool, or a blockhead; but, on the contrary, you will hear every one say, "I wish my fortune was equal to my mind." But they easily confess themselves fearful, and say, "I am somewhat timorous, I confess; but in other respects you will not find me a fool." 

        Do you not often see little dogs caressing and playing with each other, that you would say nothing could be more friendly; but to learn what this friendship is, throw a bit of meat between them, and you will see. Do you, too, throw a bit of an estate between you and your son, and you will see that he will quickly wish you underground, and you him; and then you, no doubt, on the other hand, will exclaim, "What a son I have brought up! He would bury me alive!" Throw in a pretty girl, and the old fellow and the young one will both fall in love with her. 

        Were not Eteocles and Polynices born of the same mother and of the same father? Were they not brought up, and did they not live and eat and sleep together? Did they not kiss and fondle each other? So that anyone who saw them would have laughed at all the paradoxes which philosophers utter about love. And yet, when a kingdom, or bit of meat, was thrown betwixt them, see what and how eagerly they wish to kill each other. 

        Even the stoic, Marcus Aurelius, is not above the use ridicule.  Thus he tells us in his "Meditations":  

        Wheresoever thou mayest live, there it is in thy power to be well and happy. But thou mayest live at the Court? There then also mayest thou live well and happy. 

        Schopenhauer is lavish in ridicule. Of the many examples found in his writings we may take the one in which he contrasts the successful, "clever man" with the intellectual man who, in the opinion of the world, appears as lacking in "common" sense: 

        The clever man, when he converses, will think less of what he is saying than of the person with whom he is speaking; for then he is sure to say nothing which he will afterwards regret; he is sure not to lay himself open nor to commit an indiscretion. But his conversation will never be particularly interesting.

        An intellectual man readily does the opposite, and with him the person with whom he converses is often no more than the mere occasion of a monologue; and it often happens that the other then makes up for his subordinate rôle by lying in wait for the man of intellect, and drawing his secrets out of him. 

        Even the meek Tolstoy with his doctrine of non-resistance to evil cannot resist the use of ridicule in the chastisement of human folly and conceit: 

        Lately William II ordered a new throne for himself with some special ornaments, and, dressing himself up in a white uniform with patches, in tight trousers, and in a hat with a bird on it, and throwing a red mantle over it, came out to his subjects. He seated himself on the throne with full assurance that this was a necessary and important act. His subjects saw nothing funny in all this, they even found the spectacle very majestic. 

        The Puritan, Bunyan, in his "Pilgrim's Progress” avails himself of the power of ridicule: 

        World. Why, in yonder village (the village is named Morality) there dwells a gentleman whose name is Legality, a very judicious man, and a man of a very good name, that has skill to help men off with such burdens as thine is from their shoulders; yea, to my knowledge, he hath done a great deal of good this way; aye, and besides, he hath skill to cure those that are somewhat crazed in their wits with their burdens. To him, as I said, thou mayest go, and be helped presently. His house is not quite a mile from this place; and if he should not be at home himself, he hath a pretty young man to his son, whose name is Civility, that can do it (to speak on) as well as the old gentleman himself: there, I say, thou mayest be eased of thy burden; and if thou are not minded to go back to thy former inhabitation, as indeed I would not wish thee, thou mayest send for thy wife and children to thee to this village, where there are houses now standing empty, one of which thou mayest have at a reasonable rate: provision is there also cheap and good; and that which will make thy life the more happy is to be sure there thou shalt live by honest neighbors, credit and good fashion.

        They also showed him some of the engines with which some of his servants had done wonderful things. They showed him Moses' rod; the hammer and nail with which which slew Sisera; the pitchers, trumpets, and lamps, too, with which Gideon put to flight the armies of Midian. Then they showed him the ox-goad wherewith Shamgar slew six hundred men. They showed him also the jawbone with which Sampson did such mighty feats. They showed him, moreover, the sling and stone with which David slew Goliath of Gath; and the sword also with which their Lord will kill the men of sin, in the day that he shall rise up to the prey. They showed him, besides, many excellent things, with which Christian was much delighted. This done, they went to their rest again. 

        Talk. What you will. I will talk of things heavenly, or things earthly; things moral, or things evangelical; things sacred, or things profane; things past, or things to come; things foreign, or things at home; things more essential or things circumstantial; provided that all be done to our profit. 

        Now did Faithful begin to wonder; and stepping to Christian (for he walked all this while by himself), he said to him, but softly, What a brave companion we have got! Surely, this man will make a very excellent pilgrim.

        At this Christian modestly smiled and said, This man with whom you are so taken, will beguile with this tonge of his twenty of them that know him not.

        Faith. Do you know him then?

        Chr. Know him? Yes, better than he knows himself.

        Faith. Pray, what is he?

        Chr. His name is Talkative: he dwelleth in our town. I wonder that you should be a stranger to him; consider that our town is large.

        Faith. Whose son is he? And whereabouts doth he dwell ?

        Chr. He is a son of one Say-well. He dwelt in Prating Row; and he is known to all that are acquainted with him by the name of Talkative of Prating Row; and, not withstanding his fine tongue, he is but a sorry fellow.

        Faith. Well, he seems to be a very pretty man.

        Chr. That is to them that have not a thorough acquaintance with him, for he is best abroad; near he is ugly enough. Your saying that he is a pretty man brings to my mind what I have observed in the work of a painter, whose pictures show best at a distance, but very near more unpleasing.

Faith. But I am ready to think you do but jest, because you smiled.

        Chr. God forbid that I should jest (though I smile in this matter, or that I should accuse any falsely. I will give you a further discovery of him. This man is for any company, and for any talk; as he talketh now with you, so will he talk when he is on the ale-bench; and the more drink he hath in his crown, the more of these things he hath in his mouth. Religion hath no place in his heart, or house, or conversation; all he hath lieth in his tongue, his religion is to make a noise therewith. 

        And now to the second part of the question, which concerns the tradesman you mentioned. Suppose such an one have but a poor employ in the world, but by becoming religious he may mend his market, perhaps get a rich wife, or more and far better customers to his shop; for my part, I see no reason but this may be lawfully done. For why?

        I. To become religious is a virtue, by what means soever a man becomes so.

        2. Nor is it unlawful to get a rich wife, or more custom to my shop.

        3. Besides, the man that gets these by becoming religious gets that which is good of them that are good, by becoming good himself; so then here are a good wife, and customers, and good gain, and all these by becoming religious, which is good; therefore, to become religious to all these is a good and profitable design.

        The fatter the sow is, the more she desires the mire; the fatter the ox is, the more gamesomely he goes to the slaughter; and the more healthy the lustful man is, the more prone he is unto evil. 

        In all the extracts from "Pilgrim's Progress" we find how Bunyan with all his earnest Puritanic zeal employs ridicule in behalf of religion. We further realize that ridicule consists in assimilating the irreligious, the ungodly, the immoral, the rogue, the babbler, and the hypocrite with silliness, stupidity, meanness, conceit, deceit, and vulgarity*with the pig, the sow, and the mire.